Time traveling pimps and out of pocket hos

So I was waiting for the train and the Traveling Pimp showed up again. I tried to take a pic of the guy but his Pimp Ninja powers were active and the Pimp Force is strong with this one so i couldn't get a good pic. It's as if he knew I planned on taking the picture and purposely wore clothing that would allow him to blend into the train. I did, however, manage to active my brain to take a metal picture and here is what he wore today. his hat was that huge floppy hat that my father calls a "Big Apple" style. It was grey and obscured his face and afro from being viewed from the rear. His shirt was a silk , animal print that billowed outward from his torso. It was fastened at the top button with a rhinestone broach, possibly with a string tie. His pants were high waisted and black with a circulation defying tightness from the waist down to the knee, flaring out at the calves. Pimp!

Well, I figured that this is the norm these day and chalked it up to being free spirited. That's when I realized that we are being visited from the past by time traveling pimps because that first guy was an advanced scout. I saw his commander later that day. THIS guy was wearing something out of the 1800's. Seriously this guy looked like a guy out of a Victorian novel. His hat was a type of soft top hat made from the finest felt. He had round spectacles with dark lenses. (They may have been goggles but I refuse to acknowledge that he may have been a steampunk pimp) He had on a billowy ascot in his black shirt. He also wore long coattails over ANOTHER coattails of equal length. Skinny slacks and short heeled ankle boots rounded out the outfit. If this guy was not from the past, traveling through time and misjudged the attire for this day and age, I'm the next Doctor and the TARDIS is in my backyard. Man, I wish I could have gotten some pics.

Anyway, I get to the bus and board. I usually go one stop ahead of the train station so that I can get a seat. This time the aisle was blocked by a girl with her big, dumb ass stroller. I tried to squeeze by but she stopped me by saying, rather rudely, that she was about to get off. Feeling inconvenienced, I mentioned that she should have folded up the stroller if the spot that is reserved for wheelchairs was taken.

Me: It is illegal to block the aisle with a stroller.

Her: Shit I'm about to get off the damn bus. This is not your bus!

The bus stops and the door opens. I look to see if I can squeeze by.

Her: Shit, man. Get the fuck off the bus.

Me: (Pissed) You are not supposed to have that big ass fucker on the bus blocking up the aisle anyway!

Her: Shut the fuck up before I spit on you, BITCH!! It's not your fucking bus!

Me: (Totally taken aback) Oh, yeah? Well,....I'd like to see that!

I didn't want to see that. I don't know where the hell her mouth has been. I hate when women talk greasy to you because they think that you won't punch them in the face. Well, ok, I wasn't going to punch her in the face but nobody wants to get spat on. I suppose her mouth was safe, though, because If she was a swallower she would not have had the kid in the first place.