conflict resolution

So I was riding the bus and these kids were having an argument on the back of the bus. I was on the ass end of the conversation so I don't know what the subject was. I don't know when the argument started but by the next stop one of the boys got off the bus and yell through the door "All the things you want to do I did when I was younger!" Really, little dude? You are all of 9 years old. You must haved learned those life lessons when you took that sabbatical and hitchhiked to Tibet to meet the man on top of the mountain after you did your Veterinarians without Borders tour in the Serengeti whilst taking care of three-legged giraffes with neck sprains that were born without spots. I guess you will go to NASA after you finish grade school, huh?

Anyway, as I get on the next bus I allowed a lady and her three kids to board ahead of me. She stops immediately and asks the driver if she could ride without paying because she was only going a few stops. Ok, lady. You've got kids and you don't want to walk. That is fine but now you are in my way. I pause and look at her in my" I want to go that way an you are in the way" face. She looked at me and said like she was waiting for me to get by and I said, "I can't get by you." Mind you, I had my oil bandoleros on and my backpack, plus she weighed like 300+ AND her kid was in the way. Fact is: Her 300 and my 220 could not exist in the same space. It was against some universal law of mass and we may have started some chain reaction that could have ended up involving earthquakes, tsunamis and an asteroid or two. Whatever the case, I didn't want to risk it. She looked at me like I called her fat and said, angrily, "YOU CAN GET BY!" Then she realized her kid was in the way and she snatched him out of the way and said, "Move, (insert generic south side black kid name here), before I have to cuss someone out on this bus. Whatever, lady. Just move your big, roadblock ass out of my way and keep it tucked so people can get by.