Masterpiece Theater

So I'm riding the train back from the DEEP Westside with DJ Greedy and there were a large group of young lesbians that got on with us. How do I know they were lesbians, you ask? Well the large group of dirty boys that got on were complaining that the girls were cockblocking them so either they were or they were faking the funk to avoid the boys. Anyway, all of a sudden they start acting out some type of play or something in the middle of the train. It was crazy like I was on Broadway or Shakespeare in the Park because all I needed was a song and dance number. I guess you could call them "Thespian Lesbians."

Well, after they got off there was this kid filming another kid with his camera phone and the one being filmed said he was going to pull the little red ball at the door. For those of you unfamiliar with the "little red ball," that is the emergency door release on all buses and trains. His plan was to jump off the train while still moving onto the platform while it was being filmed. "That's how you get 'Facebook Famous'," he stated while prepping for the jump. Now granted, he did do it but the train had already slowed to about 5 miles an hour. My question is where were the friggin' Cops? I crossed from one car to another, something that 100's of thousands of Chicagoans had done over the decades and I got a friggin' ticket and a court date. THIS idiot channels Super Dave Osborne and gets away with it. Where is the justice?

Well, I was talking to this nice couple (hi guys if you found my blog) and there is the strongest smell of Loud that travels my way. For those of you that don't partake, "Loud" is a type of Marijuana that smells really bad. The best way I can describe it would be Skunk piss (you know how it smells when a skunk is in the area? My Tennessee people will know that smell) or even Buck Scent for my hunter friends. AND THEY SMOKE THAT SHIT IN PUBLIC!!! Suddenly this guy asks me if I'm ever around some neighborhood on the westside and I'm like "no." He insists that he has seen me before. My head gets big and I'm thinking "this is a fan" up until he says that I bummed some change off him. Me? Asking for change? Only if I were campaigning for Obama.

So before I get off the train I see this guy that looks like Tommy from the Martin Lawrence show. He had a very strong resemblance and I was joking about it until I saw the back of his baseball jersey. "35 Thomas."