Dirty looks and dirty moves

So I was riding the bus and I decided to take an alternate route home. I usually don't take such chances but something was warding me off the normal route. Everything was running smoothly from connection to connection until I got to the Ashland bus. It was bit crowded but it was still cool. I notice that people have their favorite seats when riding on the bus and you know it when you are in their favorite seat because they give you what I like to call "the stink eye." They sometimes don't sit,even if there are seats available, and they just hang around the seat where you are sitting. Dang, lady! Normally I would have a fist full of dollars when a female has her crotch in my face and she would not be giving me those types of dirty looks. Well, maybe she would but I'd be preoccupied with ass and titties.

Anyway, speaking of strip clubs, this one lady was sitting calmly next to this guy. A few seats started to open up but she stayed put. That is usually weird for someone to stay in a seat if there is an open one near them and it usually makes the person in the window seat a bit nervous. Suddenly, the seat behind her opened up. In one super-mega-ultra smooth ass move, she grabbed the pole and swung around to the seat behind her and plopped in the window seat. (!) Did she just perform a classic stripperpole move on the bus? It was so quick and professional that I almost didn't catch it. As I replay it in my mind I do believe that she was in the classic one leg out swing around position that all stripper learn in stripper basic training at the stripper academy at Everest College. She was older so she may have been a Professor. (Professor XXX)

Well, when I got to 79th I had to cross the street for the bus. This little, Old lady was next to me at the crosswalk. Did she just check me? I look her over. She has a cane but I think I can take her. The light turned green and she took off! We were neck and neck and I was positioning to pass her but she kept edging me out with that damned cane. I'm not letting this old bat beat me to the corner! I go to make my move and...wait.....did she just hit turbo? This old bat just beat me in the straightaway. I didn't notice that she had on orthopedics and that gave her the edge. I'm going to take you next time, you old biddy!