Good Lookin' Bill

So I'm riding the bus and I don't see any familiar faces. Within 10 seconds I'm already pissed because this one guy is talking to himself. Now when I say "talking to himself" I don't mean in the way that a regular person might but this guy was like Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." It was like there were two people talking. He had a normal voice which was named Bill and then there was this really high pitched voice who didn't give his name. Now Bill's full title was "Good Lookin' Bill, never worked and never will." Man, I wished I had my headphones.